No wonder I have to shave so much

I have to say, this was based on 5 questions which had multiple appropriate answers. so...

You Are a Werewolf

You're unpredictable, moody, and downright freaky. You seem sweet and harmless, until you snap. Then you're a total monster. Very few people can predict if you're going to be Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde. But for you, all your transformations seem perfectly natural. Your greatest power: Your ability to tap into nature Your greatest weakness: Lack of self control You play well with: Vampires

What Kind of Monster Are You?

why does this werewolf look so androgenous?

Peep Show

Tonight, as I sit looking over “stuff”, I have Peep show on in the background. Series four, the one where they go away on the barge, meet the two girls, Jez reverses over the girl’s dog and then the real lying starts. The massive Olympic standard spiralling out of control chain reaction lying that culminates with Mark engineering a job interview and Jez claiming that the contents of the bag he’s been carrying around is “just a hairy turkey” as he tears a mouthful off of the half cooked dog leg. Cringetastic

oh, Phoenix Nights is shite. Sorry but it's true. If you were confused before, go watch it again, you'll see what I mean.

Excuses

Sorry this has been a bit quiet but last week I was feeling a bit off colour. In fact, a lot off colour, and the colour was brown.
I managed to contract “gastric flu” or viral food poisoning. Which wasn’t nice at all. From Tuesday to Friday I had horrible intestinal cramps and in the four days had two bowls of soup for sustenance.
Every time I ate, I had more cramp, so why would I? Anyway, mostly better. I'm still a bit weak, but that might have been normal and my expectations are too high.

I wonder what it’ll be this week...?

The week that was

Well, an interesting week. Starting last Saturday night with a very satisfying DJ set, included Velvet Acid Christ and Lemon Jelly, in Tasquilado in Guimarães followed by the theft of my CDs. Sunday was weird with much soul searching, anger, frustration et cetera which coalesced into a poster campaign with myself and others putting up posters offering a reward for the CDs’ return on Monday. Nothing…
Tuesday, reported the crime to the Police, who were very nice. Then put more posters this time with the added incentive of a fast buck or the offer of €100. Not a lot of money considering. I was going to put €200 straight off, but was dissuaded by local knowledge. Phone call and meeting in scary place at midnight and two vinyl CD cases were in my possession, and €100 was decidedly not. I should add, my phone number was in each case, so these were returned due to uncomfortable pressure, by so many people asking and greed. I am not sure the pressure alone would have been sufficient.
So, tonight, another short spin on the decks and I have the request that should I recognise the kids who made the exchange, I should point them out to the bar’s rather bury owner. I think were I to do so, some talking with fists, and no glove puppetry here my friend, would be on the cards.
Thanks to all who helped me, who translated my posters into Portuguese, who accompanied me to the Police station, who asked everyone to keep an eye and ear out and of course the chap who came to the stadium with me and made sure I wasn’t just mugged for the money.

ah ha ha ha

after a huge pressure and poster campaign, all bar one disks returned. I'd like to thank all at CAR and at El Rock in Guimaraes for their support and pressure. I like to think that the pressure applied by questions and action greased by €100 brought this matter to it's pentultimate conclusion. One disk is outstanding. where is it? i haven't checked the list yet, but this voids certain agreements i think.
I will recheck all. wait for a phone number to repeatedly ring twice and hang up...

Good morning Guimarães

I really am kind of numb right now. My previous high regard for Guimarães has been fucked in quite the most awful way.
I DJed tonight at Tasquilado which went well. Fabulous.
I then went to CAR, where at some point I neglected my bag and it was stolen. CDs. Gone.
Sorry Danielle, I will replace yours first.
I feel horribly betrayed. Not only by the thieving filth that took the disks, but also by my own naïve nature about such things.
The old guy in CAR that kept yelling “Speak Portuguese” at me didn’t help. He wasn’t even a purist that stuck to “fala Portuguese” which I would have had more respect for. He was xenophobic and obstinate. So, looking forward to being home, and looking at Amazon to start replacing about €2000 of CDs.
Thanks

slithering with snails

Went out for a couple of beers (glasses of wine darling) after I signed up for a couple of months pounding at the gym. Apparently I will be attending 3 times a week to sort out my LARD accumulation problem. It can only be a good thing because right now I am getting rather rotund. On the Brightside, the accepted calculations of BMI still claim I am in the normal region, what the figures don’t see is that my legs arms and head are not fat. The cylinder suspending itself about my middle is crying out for a tattoo saying either Dunlop or Yokohama. Running on slicks is a slippery slope for sure. It rained a lot today and as I came home a large number of snails saw the rain as a time for a mass exodus. Most were heading from the grass verge to the kerbside, whilst some seemed to be heading back to the verge. I can only imagine they were doing widths. I saw one, perpendicular to the others, a show off lengths man no doubt. The weather here changes fast, those pavements dry up. That chap (snail) will come a cropper. Didn’t see any dead animals today, not even snails.
Nice relief.

A snail, last night

Aqui no Portugal (that's wrong for sure)

Been a bit odd being back here in warmish old Portugal. Was feeling a bit weird at the weekend and wisely avoided too much contact, lest I go completely mental. Last week I saw a UK registered Jaguar XJ6 outside the bar next to the fire station. Nice old G reg maroon thing, taxed till November this year. I found myself circling and hanging about it, hoping to meet the owner, more likely throw myself on his mercy and beg him to let me come back to Blighty, explaining that I wouldn’t mind riding in the boot. Thankfully the world was spared such a wretched display as I buckled and went into the bar for a drink and on my return the car was gone. Poor bugger was probably waiting for me to move to safely get to his car. Later I saw the ugliest truck ever, save for the fact it appeared to be fabricated from bare shiny metal. I have no idea what it was, but it was travelling very slowly and was again UK registered, a D plate. I saw a dead hedgehog on the shortcut to the apartment as I struggled home with 15 litres of milk, water and dog food. I finally became so appalled by the diet the poor thing has to suffer that I really don’t mind feeding it. I just won’t tell the “owner”. If ever a word was at its loosest application, this is it.

I’ll cheer up.

Just you wait and see.



Meanwhile, clicky the nice soundwave and have a listen.